CHILE!
My sister, Amelia, was born 20 years ago today. I was the baby in the family until she came along and ruined everything. My sister is single-handedly responsible for my dislike of toddlers.
Louisville, Kentucky Circa 1993
My sister, a screaming 2 year-old, pounds at a glass screened door willing her parents to return from a night out. I try soothing words (she can’t hear them over her screams). I try The Lion King (who doesn’t love Hakunah Matata?!). I try a cookie (good girl – never too young to start thinking about your hips). None of it works. Finally, I walk out of the front door and leave her alone to cry after me. But in my defense (!!!)… I only walk around to the side of the house; I don’t actually leave. And it’s not like I give her Nyquil. Or vodka. Or duct-tape her mouth shut. Or smother her screams with a pillow. Give me a break - I was only 14! If it makes you feel any better I don’t care much for teenagers either.
Grosse Pointe, Michigan Circa 1999
I’m home from college and for whatever reason, happen to change clothes in front of her. The girl looks at my body and screams bloody murder then runs out of the room. (I will have you know that this is the first and only time someone has seen me sans clothing and runs, thank you!). Apparently she noticed the new belly button piercing that I got during my spring break trip in Miami. She does not yet realize that there are worse things one can pick up on South Beach. Honestly, what a drama queen! We obviously have nothing in common.
Seriously, for sisters who share DNA and grew up with the same parents, it really is surprising how different we are. I’ve met Rosario Dawson in person. Besides wanting to follow her home like a lost puppy, I kept thinking, how do I look more like this complete stranger than I do my own flesh and blood sister? Perhaps I was right all along… my parents found Amelia in a dumpster, felt pity for her and brought her home. It certainly would explain why she is a vegetarian and I eat steak rare enough to ooze blood down the side of my mouth, using only the back of my hand to wipe it clean.
Amelia would rather join the Peace Corps than walk a day in combat boots. She cannot do the robot. She cannot quote Top Gun. She wears a D-cup. But before you think she is a complete loser…
Valparaiso Chile, Present Day
Amelia is a junior in college, getting a double major and minor in Spanish. She is studying in South America for the semester. I could go on and on about her accomplishments, but you know how I hate to brag, even if it is on behalf of my smart, gorgeous, cool, quirky, loving and amazing sister.
Despite our differences we love each other as much as any sisters could. I would rather walk through fire than see her in pain. And no matter how old she gets she will still be my baby sister who will remain almost but not quite as pretty as me.
Amelia Teresa, aka Smelly Mellie
I would like to congratulate her on her birth, on this the day of her birth. And may her first drink tonight be paid for by a masculine Chilean.
